Trail Mix :: No. 06

Why I Wiped Out My Instagram, Witnessing Our Own Unfolding, In Praise of Pivots & Podcasts

Delicate and determined crocuses I found prying their way up through a thick layer of heavy, damp, decomposing leaves

Where did all my posts go?

The short answer: No, I wasn’t hacked. I chose to pay about $80 to have all 9 years of my Instagram posts deleted.

The longer explanation: I didn’t plan on doing this, at least not now. It came about on a whim after a rather lively conversation with my husband. In one sentence: I am currently in the midst of a pivot and needed to hit reset in a myriad of ways. Wiping out my social media history felt deeply cathartic and gave me more momentum to continue making necessary, meaningful changes in other areas of my life. Anyone else care to join me?

This whole experience of being me, and trying to stay in the energy of my never-ending evolution, is keeping me on the edge of my seat to be sure!

Witnessing Our Own Unfolding

There’s something so fun about staying present with our lives and bearing witness to our own unfolding. Here are few recent changes I have seen happening in my life, all of which have left me “scited”. (I got that word from Glennon Doyle, scared + excited = scited!) You and I, we are specially designed, it’s woven into our nature, to keep growing and flowing!

• Recently, I put the brakes on a beautiful, soul-filling project called Being Human Magazine that I and two other friends started in early 2020. You might have seen the update here. When I shared the news with one of our new contributors she passed on this treasure to me: “I am fully supportive of women making hard decisions and having to pivot mid-project. If you ask me, its a sign of self-awareness and attunement to Divine movement.”

• Then, about a week ago, I had a surprising revelation in my minivan on my way home from my usual grocery pick-up Monday. It had to do with confronting my unconscious desire to become a millionaire, did you read it yet? Consequently, I’m finally, after way too many years, entering the working world and giving up on the romanticized story that kept me hoping, wishing, and dreaming that someday I might be a published author or “make it big” with one of my creative projects. I’ve always remembered these words from Elizabeth Gilbert but only now am I taking them to heart:
  
  “Don’t burden your creativity with the responsibility of paying for your life. Keep your creativity free and safe.”

• And lastly, I’ve been writing more candidly about the challenges and triumphs of my marriage and giving a behind-the-scenes, honest peek into our life together. I wanted to begin telling some of our story with courage and vulnerability in hopes other couples wouldn't be ashamed or worried about the deficiencies in their relationships either.
  
  I do not want to garner anyone’s concern or pity or advice for us, rather I am simply doing what I love as a writer- putting language to what I’m learning and articulating the particular truth (triumphs, struggles, courage, and fears) of what it’s been like for my husband and me to be married as two whacked up and whimsical human beings!

That said, I won’t be divulging these intimate details on Instagram anymore, BUT you will still be able to find them and all my other long-form letters, essays, and vignettes here on Substack and my Art of Adventure blog. So stay tuned for more, I know the marriage talk has been resonating with many of you!

And about social media…

My conclusion is life is far too nuanced and layered to try and capture profound moments or translate experiences into short, pithy posts on Instagram, wouldn’t you agree?

When I do show up on Instagram it will be with a different focus. You can count on me using it to document our random adventures as a family, favorite places I love to go in my cozy village-city here in the Pacific Northwest, tips on how to embrace a low-waste, sustainable lifestyle, and my affection for all things Europe, walkable/bikeable/pedestrian friendly towns, running, books, and spirituality.

In Praise of Pivots.

It is my sincere desire that this week’s letter serves as a reminder to you- it’s never too late to change directions, try a different route, be interested in and start studying new topics, or explore other options.

Here’s to letting yourself surprise yourself!

Three Podcasts I Enjoyed This Week:

1. Tara McMullin’s What Works Podcast on Time & Money (EP 372 & 373) have been so insightful! A particular part stood out to me: “Many of us spend so much time thinking about reaching more people- that we never consider whether the better way forward might be phone calls, handshakes, and introductions.”

2. I think Glennon is such an authentic human being. This week she opened up to the world and shared her Hardest Thing (S1E70 of We Can Do Hard Things). She is one of my heroes.

3. And Phil and Jen Wood interview one my favorites, Rob Bell. It’s called We Can (Make) Change: A Masterclass in Growth.

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If you have questions or comments about anything I’ve written about, feel free to write me a message (charissaann@gmail.com) or text me (360-525-7607)! I promise to respond.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Onward into the weekend with wonder,